Thankful Thursday!

Instead of posting on Facebook for 30 days about things I am thankful for, I’m going to give it to you all at one time.  To be perfectly honest, I’m just that lazy some days and focusing for that long is nearly impossible for me.  So, here goes…

 

1.     I am thankful I am not a turkey, deer or a duck this time of year. 

2.    I am thankful for deodorant and that most people use it.

3.     I am thankful for 10 toes with good grip.  How else would I be able to pick up so many things off the floor without having to bend over?

4.    I am thankful that my vacuum has wheels.  You know that piece of lint on your carpet that just will not come up?  Best thing about wheels.

5.    I am thankful for Macklemore.  It’s ok to THRIFTSHOP!!!

6.     I am thankful for darkness.  Seriously, who wants to witness me running in the light of day?

7.    I am thankful for Facebook.  Neglecting my family so that I can see what you had for lunch has never been so easy.

8.    I am thankful for Miley Cyrus.  Without her, I quite frankly may never have figured out what to twerk or when to tweet.

9.    I am thankful for coupons.  Scoring $972 worth of products that I will never ever use for $2.88 is the best feeling ever.

10.I am thankful for Obama.  I don’t feel so bad that I voted for George “W”’s 2^nd term.

11.  I am thankful for magic easers.  Instead of repainting the house, the blood just wipes off the walls.

12. I am thankful for control top -- I instantly get the appearance of doing 100 days of sit-ups.

13.  I am thankful for caller id.   I can see who is calling and avoid you if I want to.

14. I am thankful for auto correct.  Nothing can make me look like an idiot quicker than pressing SEND.

15. I am thankful for medication.  How else would I be able to make it through the holidays so merry and bright?

16.  I am thankful for GPS.  I don’t know how I ever managed to get home from work every day without getting lost.

17. I am thankful for texting.  I can manage an entire relationship without ever saying a word.

18. I am thankful for all the sex scandals.  Even more thankful that my name didn’t appear in any of them.

19.   I am thankful for mopeds.  I get a chance to test my defensive driving skills every single day.

20. I am thankful for tailgating drivers.  By honking your horn and flashing your lights, you have alerting me to my impending doom.  I must have been driving too fast…let me sloooooww down for you.  Hint…next time leave sooner!

21. I am thankful for chevron.  The fashion industry would have had absolutely nothing to print on clothes this summer without it. 

22.  I am thankful for Zumba.  I found parts of my body that I never knew existed.

23.I am thankful for self-restraint.  I would hate to have to introduce you to the real country girl that lives inside me when you tick me off.

24.  I am thankful for my family.  I have learned to accept them for who they are.  We will just leave it at that.

25.   I am thankful for my son.  Without him, I never would have discovered that Pluto really wasn’t a planet.

26.I am thankful for my daughter.  My mom always wished that I would have a child that acted just like me.  Guess grandma forgot she would be the one babysitting.

27.  I am thankful for my husband.  He taught me to translate.  “It cost $30” in man talk is translated into woman terms “I paid $75.”  “I will be there in 10 minutes”….translates to…”30 minutes is soon enough”.

28.  I am thankful for all the junk in my purse.  If a skinny mugger tries to take it and run, I imagine he won’t get very far.  Dead weight is heavy.

29.  I am thankful for you.  If it wasn’t for you reading this, I wouldn’t have wasted the last 6 hours composing it.

30.  Last but certainly not least, I am thankful that I will not have to come up with a new list until next year.  Whew…I’m exhausted.

Happy Thanksgiving Yall!!!  Eat Turkey, Sleep Well!